Do you ever look around and wonder exactly how you managed or are managing to survive a particular season in life? That is me right now, living in the fast and crazy lane, just praying that life will slow down soon. But you know, this morning at church the Holy Spirit just spoke right into my soul through the sermon and I have been trying to wrap my head around it all day.
As of this moment, God has us in a very flux moment in life. The last year almost has been in the "slow down God, slow down" phase as Beth Moore discussed in her Esther study (which I managed to finish May 2012 right before things started to speed up).
My DH husband (Matthew) finished his PhD in December of 2011 (as you already know). We spent the spring of 2012 catching our breath from the marathon of grad-school and adding a new little blessing to the mix. God showed us several things during that time and also kind of shook our world as we moved on from the church we had called home for almost 6 years (more on that lesson later).
In the summer of 2012, my DH began the process of finding a tenure track job. Thankfully, the Lord had provided a great job for my DH that allowed us to be choosey about where we applied and also provided the "guarantee" of a continued lectureship should we decide to stay put. After prayer and talking, we decided to give it "our best shot" for the 2012 job market and push through the fall to decide whether to put down roots or move on. The fall of 2012 is when the "train of life" (since Judah is really into those right now) began speeding down the track and leaving us wondering what was around the bend.
Matthew spent the fall teaching his classes, going to job interviews (all over the country), traveling with his moot court team, and spending whatever time he could with us. After 8 multi-day trips between late October and the second week of December, the fall semester came to a close. However, over Thanksgiving break Matthew was offered a job in El Paso, Texas. We prayed and prayed over the job and just couldn't find peace about taking it. So without any other offer on the table we turned it down. We knew Matthew was in the final three at a couple of other places over Christmas break.
Those negotiations were finalized at the beginning of February and we began getting our first house ready to go on the market. We listed our house the beginning of March and began the non-stop cleaning that goes with showing a house with two under four in the house.
My sister graduated from Marine OCS on August 9th in Quantico, Virginia. My parents, the kiddos, and I took a nice, but quick road trip up to her graduation for the weekend.
My Gram (mom's mom) fell and broke her hip in four spots and needed surgery two weeks ago. She is in rehab now. Two days before that my Granny (dad's mom) broke her pelvis and fractured one of her vertebrae. Today we found out she is bleeding on the brain and is having emergency surgery for that. This has just been another reminder that life is short and we aren't promised tomorrow.
So, now since they are hopefully finishing up repairs, we hope to close on Friday. With some sadness (since we have been spoiled having grandparents around), the kiddos and I are going to make the drive to our new hometown on Tuesday and hopefully this speed of life will slow down a bit.
This past year has been NUTS and sadly looking back, I feel like many times I tried to handle it on my own instead of going to my Source for strength, peace, and perseverance. I know I have failed in keeping all my "hats" stacked on my head. In many ways, I feel like this move is a fresh start. A new house and new neighbors. A new home-school year. New lives to reach with the Message of Redemption. A new chance to assess and prioritize my life. A chance to simplify my life. A new chance to humbly come before my King and drink from His fountain of Life. A new chance to lay aside every weight, and sin that holds on to me, and run with endurance the Race that is set before me.
I want to run. I want to run that race looking to Jesus and not letting the cares and worries of this world take my eyes off of Him.
I want to RUN!
I want to run to HIM!